September 3, 1975.......The day the lives of Jackie and Mike McComas changed forever. I know every parent says that when a child is born, and I also know that is true of every family, that first baby does change your life forever. No one can describe that feeling, if you are not a parent you just don't know, and yes I include parents who adopt, they definitely experience that same feeling. There are things that come close but just don't hit the nail on the head, so to speak. I will say this though, Ryan not only changed our lives but he changed the lives of many others along the way. He was so tiny. He only weighed 5 pounds at birth and then when he came home he only weighed 4 pounds 12 ounces. He didn't get on the growth chart, well, I'm not sure he ever was really on the growth chart...just kidding. He was a bundle of life and he seemed to be able to light up the faces of all those around him. He went 100% all day long but when he laid his head down at night, he was out.
We lived in Stillwater until he was almost 3. When I say Ryan learned to walk I really should say when he learned to run. He never really walked anywhere and when we bought new shoes they had to run fast. A very dear friend always referred to him as Rambunctious Ryan. We moved to Beggs America for 10 months before we moved back to Caddo County. Within minuets of moving to Beggs he made friends of all the neighbor kids. His favorite was a little girl who lived a couple of houses away. We lived 6 months in Anadarko while we worked on our house at Oney. Sunset circle was a great place for him, but that is where he learned you were supposed to knock before you went in to people's houses. LOL Ryan loved living at Oney. He played baseball, basketball, rode horses and showed pigs. He could drive a pickup with a clutch at 5 years old....he had to stand up to see over the wheel. He loved his two sisters to the moon and back. He made many life long friends while we lived out there.
We moved to Washita on 72 acres in July of 1985 and he started 4th Grade in Anadarko. It was on that 72 acres where he really grew up. He loved living on that 72 acres of trees. He could get up and go hunt right on his own land. He had two buddies that lived on the 80 acres that connected to us. We were 7 miles from town and between the 2 families we had 6 children. There were always more that 6 out there, but they had some great times. Ryan played baseball, basketball, golf, tennis, football and of course his real love was for Wrestling. In the summer he loved to swim and dive. He became a lifeguard before he was 16. He was strong as an oxen and never had an ounce of fat on that body.
When it came to school Ryan excelled there too. I am quite sure he didn't have the highest IQ in the class, but he truly was one of the hardest working students. I think that some felt it came very easy for him, but he did study at home pretty much every night. Math was something that did come easier to him than it does to some, but he always wanted more. I think his favorite thing was languages. He could speak, and write Spanish fluently. At WP he learned to speak German. He even wanted to go into Intelligence. He was also involved in many clubs. He was active in Boy Scouts of America, 4-H, FBLA, Spanish Club, Student Council, and I'm sure I have left out others. He went on trips with 4-H, FBLA, and church. Ryan loved life and he probably worked too hard to try to get everyone to like him. Most did, but he wanted everyone to. He was a people pleaser. He wanted to make you smile or laugh if at all possible.
Ryan had a way of making everyone feel like they were his best friend. I am not sure how many best friends he had. If someone did get mad at him they never stayed that way very long. How could you. He would just flash that smile at you and you would melt. He made us all proud when he graduated and decided to go to Blair Academy in Blairstown, New Jersey in order to wrestle and prepare to go to West Point. It was very ironic that he chose to go to West Point and was accepted. He always played like he was a soldier growing up. Only 1200 young people are selected in each class to attend West Point....about 25,000 apply each year. It is what you call highly selective. Senator David Boren was the political appointment that Ryan went to West Point under.
He wrestled at Blair Academy and also at West Point. He placed 3rd at Prep School Nationals while at Blair and lettered his plebe year at West Point. He decided not to wrestle his Yearling year at WP. He played 135 pound and under football in full pads. That is where he got his concussion that lead to having PTCS. He was at Walter Reed Hospital in Washington DC. While home from WP on leave, he was tragically killed in a car accident on January 14, 1997. This is how I know The Rest of the Story. This is when I began to understand the number lives he had touched.
There were over 1000 people at his funeral. West Point sent Dr. Robert Smith, Ryan's adopted family father, to give us his certificate of Graduation with the class of 1999. At the memorial service they had for Ryan at West Point several of his friends spoke. His roommate sang and another close friend spoke and referred to a song that Billy Dean sang entitled Once In a While. If you've never heard it you should listen to it. My heart was broken, but also full to know that his friends felt that way about him. I know that Ryan truly was a gift from God. He only lived a short 21 years but he accomplished more in that time than many do in twice that time. There were people who named their children after him and many more who sent letters, called and came to visit us just to tell us how much he meant to them.
His dad and I really did our best to instill the values we had been raised with, but it's hard to take credit for the man he turned out to be, I really do think God sent him to us. He was here for a reason and I'm very sure that he accomplished what he was here for. Even though it has been almost 18 years, I think that maybe he is still having an impact on those who knew him. I still have people tell me things he did that had an influence on their lives. I miss him every day but I also know that he is with the Father and I know I would never ask him to come back. I do wish I could see him, the song One More Day pretty much sums up how I feel. What most parents who have lost a child wouldn't do to just have one more day with their child. I take comfort in knowing that I will be reunited with Ryan one day and in knowing that he is in a much better place. I am just thankful that God picked me to be his mom. It's hard to believe it's been 18 years since we celebrated his 21st birthday, which would turn out to be his last birthday here with us. He would be 39 years old this year. That's hard to even imagine. He will be forever 21 to us. So today all that I can do is wish Rambunctious Ryan Happy Birthday in Heaven!!!!
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